The onslaught of pornography in the lives of our families, businesses, entertainment, and yes even in our churches is causing my spirit to grieve with heaviness.  I have realized for quite some time that pornography was an evil and growing menace in our society, but until I recently began doing some research on the topic, I was not aware of the size and scope of the issue.

It is time for the people in America to wake up and take action on this very damaging evil in our nation.  The statistics are telling me that $3075.64 is being spent on porn in America every SECOND!  Every 39 minutes another pornographic video is created in the United States.  World wide revenues from pornography have topped over $100 billion dollars annually.  In the United States alone, Americans are spending in excess of $13.3 billion dollars in the midst of the worst recession most of us have ever seen.  My own city, Oklahoma City, now ranks in the TOP 10 cities for “adult search requests” over the internet, right in the buckle of the Bible belt.  This single statistic is probably what saddens me the most.

In the offices of corporate America, 20% of men and 13% of business women confess to using porn at work, placing their careers, reputations, finances and families at risk because of their addictive behavior.  There are over 40 million adults who regularly (multiple times weekly) visit porn sites.  47% of Christians who were polled, say that pornography is a major problem inside of their families.  Promise Keepers were polled and 53% of men polled, had visited a porn site within one week of the survey.

The numbers are staggering the deeper I looked into the statistics.  The average age of the first exposure to pornography is age eleven.  ELEVEN YEARS OLD!  The seeds of lust, selfishness and desire are planted in the hearts of our youngest children.  For many, it began as they found one the magazines their fathers were hiding in their bedroom or closet.  The seed began to grow and take root in the hearts of our teenage boys.

Their warped sense of love and desire begins to produce evil fruit before they graduate from middle and high school.  They have no right perspective for treating young ladies with dignity and respect as they enter the dating years.  Their obsession has progressed beyond the magazines and pictures, now they are into videos and live strip clubs to satisfy the unquenchable lust for more erotica.  They naturally compare what they have been feeding their minds and spirits for years, with the young ladies who now desires some level of relationship with them.

These young men grow up into adults and carry their hidden sin with them as they begin their family.  By now it is out of control and they have no idea how to stop this monster that rages within them.  They have probably discovered by now that the addiction has control over them, and most are at a loss as to what to do or where to go, so they are copping the best they know how.  Eventually, they will be found out…but at what cost?  Will the addiction cost them their job, marriage, family, friends, or even their lives?

Romans 12:2-3 states, “Do not conform to the pattern of the world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.  Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”  We must renew our minds with the word of God.  Philippians 4:8 states, “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”  More than anything, remember that James 5:16 states, “Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.  The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.”

Seek the help of your pastor, friend, or counselor—but seek help, and overcome this powerful addiction.  Luke 1:37 states, “Nothing is impossible with God.”  We are more than conquerors in Christ Jesus and we too can overcome the evil one, because, “Greater is he who is in me than he who is in the world.” (I John 4:4)  Seek help today!  You may contact me privately if you desire at boeparrish.1@gmail.com and I will be happy to help you and pray for you!!

1.)    TRUST:  We totally trust each other with everything in our relationship.  There are no secrets we have hidden from one another.
2.)    COMMUNICATION:  My wife and I communicated with each other all of the time as we were dating.  The mystery of who we were had to be discovered by each of us…we’re still discovering and still communicating.
3.)    FINANCIAL UNITY:  We have never had separate bank accounts.  Every penny earned, was “ours” and all of the goals and dreams for the finances were ours.  It was never mine or yours, but always ours.
4.)    INTIMACY:  Having the purity of an old fashioned relationship, where neither one had ever been with another person.  Having no one to compare the other person with, has allowed us total security in our love for each other.
5.)    PURITY:  Maintaining the purity of our relationship with each other.  There is never a second chance at having and maintaining a pure marriage, and guarding it  at all cost.
6.)    ACCOUNTABILITY:  Making ourselves accountable for two crucial areas of  our marriage…Time and Money.
7.)    PRAYING TOGETHER: Praying together regardless, has been a source of  strength and encouragement for us both.  It is really hard to pray together and end the day still angry with each other.
8.)    STAY-BILITY:  This is more than what most think as stability…we are staying together period.  Divorce is never an option, and never mentioned from our lips.
9.)    TENDERNESS:  We value and respect each other, and constantly lift each other up in our speech.  She is my bride and I am her groom!  We treat each other with tenderness and respect just as we did in the beginning.
10.)  GIVING TO EACH OTHER:  We decided to give our lives to each other when  we got married.  Finding creative ways to continue giving and sharing our lives is a hallmark of 31 years of giving to each other.

Does everything have to be so sterile, cold and secular when it comes to work?  Are corporations so afraid of litigation, and offending someone, that they have completely outlawed God from being present anywhere near their business or employees?  Why are people offended so easily when God is mentioned outside of the walls of the church?

Is there no need in anyone’s life for a compassionate, caring and comforting God?  Do employees have to check their souls at the door as they enter their respective places of work?  Has all conflict, job stress, marriage issues, chemical addictions, and financial challenges vanished from the workplace?  Are employees totally free from the clutches of pornography, drug addiction, gambling, alcoholism, depression and anger issues?  I believe all of us are intelligent enough to realize the answer to these questions.

Certainly, there have been numerous times in the marketplace, when the dogma of one person has been offered without sensitivity, and offended or alienated other employees.  Everyone should learn to be very sensitive and respectful of each other’s spirituality.  I believe we’ve learned from many years of discussing religion in the work environment, that there is a hunger in the soul of corporate America for some deep and meaningful dialog about God, faith, church, and how God makes a difference in every part of our lives.

No one wants to be judged, condemned, or alienated because of a faith in God, nor an absence of a faith in God.  Every human being has been created with a desire and a thirst to know more about how we came to be, and what our purpose on this earth is?  It is a natural quest to know more about our spirituality, and who better to dialog with than with our friends and co-workers at the office that we know and trust.

The spirituality issue will always surface as we travel through the journey of life.  I propose that allowing God’s gentle presence into the halls and boardrooms of corporate America is vital and even necessary, for the well being of our employees.  I’m not advocating turning our companies into houses of worship, but can’t we just allow Him a place among us as we go about our work day?  Is there anything wrong with that?

 When was the last time you sat down, looked your friend, spouse, or child in the eye and really paid attention to what they had to say?  If you are like most people that doesn’t sound too difficult…until you try to do it.  Most of us believe we are too busy to give that sort of attention on a regular basis.  We want to talk “on the move,” while we are doing other things.  We call it multi-tasking and we excuse our failure to really be attentive by saying, as well as believing, that we are so busy that a constructive use of our time is not really focusing on any one thing or person.  We convince ourselves that we are better time managers when we are communicating on the move, at a shallow depth, and without any kind of real commitment. I think all that is a cop-out.  Being truly attentive is something most of us just don’t want to do.  We think it requires too much and may end up costing us more than we want to give.  By not paying attention we can keep our distance and move along without any real commitment.  Being attentive scares us to death!  Yet, it is exactly what our relationships need!  “Attentiveness is showing the worth (value) of a person or task by giving your undivided concentration (attention).” Who can you give your undivided attention today, and by doing so, show them how important they are to you and how much you value your relationship with them?

Why do you procrastinate?  What causes any of us to put off things that need to be done?  First, thinking that you absolutely have to do something is a major reason for procrastination.  Feeling like you have to do something can automatically make you defensive and resentful.  You need to realize that you never have to do something.  Of course, the consequences might be pretty severe, but the decision to do something is ultimately yours.

Second, thinking of a task as something huge that you have to get completed can ensure that you put it off.  Rather than focusing on finishing a task, change your focus to doing it, step by step, until it is completed.  If you say to yourself, “I’ve got to do my taxes today,” or “I must complete this report,” you are very likely to feel overwhelmed and end up putting off the task.  Start one small piece of the task instead of thinking that you must finish the whole thing.  Focus on what you know you can get done right now.  If you do this enough, you will eventually complete the whole task!

Other ways to battle the challenge of procrastination include:

• Recognize personal issues such as fear, anxiety, difficulty concentrating, poor time management, indecisiveness, and perfectionism
• Identify your goals, strengths and weaknesses, values and priorities
• Determine if your values are consistent with your actions
• Discipline your use of time.  Find ways to organize
• If you can, work in small blocks of time, gradually increasing the length of each time block
• Motivate yourself to work.  Dwell on success, not failure.
• Work with others.  Be accountable for each task
• Set realistic goals

Finally, do not take pride in your procrastination by joking about it all the time.  It is a significant problem that needs to be dealt with in a positive way.  Ask for help if you need it!

 What occurs next is wide-spread fear, anxiety and stress.  Many of the workers who are relieved of their jobs are losing much more than income and security, they are losing friends, futures, and even health.  Their homes, possessions and mental well being in an instant, are placed at great risk.  We know all these things, we hear them every day on the news, read about them in the paper and even discuss them with the very employees being terminated.  The statistics are staggering when you examine them.  Everyone from the Whitehouse to the outhouse is talking about the economy, layoffs, and statistics.  In November alone, employers took 2,328 mass layoff actions involving a total of 224,079 workers according to US Labor statistics.

 What is being offered to assist these displaced employees, besides just the unemployment benefits, which fall woefully short?  Is there any counseling of employment, emotional, financial, or spiritual help or hope being offered?  Where do these hundreds of thousands of individuals and families turn for help beyond the obvious?  Local churches, non-profits, and companies who may still be hiring, need to be stepping up and serving the masses who are devastated, hopeless, and unless something happens soon, homeless.

 A few practical suggestions for terminated employees might be to tap into some government funding for education during this season, and improving your marketability.  Immediately, I would set up a profile on Linked In, Plaxo, My Space or Facebook for higher visibility, so the companies and recruiters who are still searching for quality employees, can find you.  If you do not have access to computers at home, the public libraries normally have a few for the general public to use for free.  Next, I would begin networking with family, friends, neighbors, churches, coffee shops or anyone you may cross paths with about employment opportunities. 

 For those surviving employees who didn’t receive a layoff notice, they are probably being asked to increase their workloads, while struggling to overcome the guilt of still having their jobs.  The anxiety, increased levels of stress and fear of losing their jobs, and increased pressure to produce more, will eventually wear these employees down.  Unless management and business owners proactively offer hope and help to these employees, they will soon observe performance downturns with their remaining employees.

 Layoff survivors need businesses to offer them hope for the future, and help for the present, as they press on with more to do than they ever imagined they would find themselves responsible for.  Increased pressure at the office, coupled with more and more demands from home and marriage, is almost more than most employees are able to handle.

 Corporate Care, Incorporated is offering employees hope and practical help during these trying economic times of today.  By placing corporate chaplains in companies for the surviving employees, there is a strong measure of hope that is offered.  Chaplains are there for the employees to listen and offer strength, hope, direction, guidance, and options for employees to consider.  Armed with many years of practical life experience, professional and business knowledge, as well as compassionate hearts and listening ears, these men and women are there for surviving employees 24/7/365!

 It’s not just prayers being offered employees, although we can all use as much prayer as we can get.  No, these seasoned professionals are knowledgeable and deeply networked throughout their communities.  They are aware of low-cost and no-cost programs through the United Way, churches, and non-profits.  Many times they are serving on the board, or are directly relating with organizations that have tremendous resources available for employees.

 Additionally, they befriend employers too, offering listening ears and encouraging words of wisdom for them as well.  No one feels worse than employers feel about having to layoff employees.  The employers are walking around with heavy hearts, if not broken hearts, resulting from having to layoff employees.  They are mentally and physically exhausted from the difficult tasks they have been forced to carry out.  They need encouragement and hope as much as the employees do, if not more.  Most of the employers have very few individuals in whom they can totally confide in.  Corporate chaplains offer help and hope to employers and employees alike.

 This may be an option your company has never known about, or considered in the past, but with these trying times today, they may be more open to this type of relationship, if someone offers it as a suggestion.  Companies all over the nation are now receiving hope and help from some of the most unlikely places.  Remember, your employees don’t care how much you know…until they know how much you care!  Proving you care in a very tangible and practical way, has never been more important than today.  Will you offer hope and help?  Will you be there for your surviving employees?  Will you allow professionals to become the extension of your caring arm and compassionate heart, or will you keep doing the same thing and expect the results to change?

 Corporate Care is making a difference everyday to thousands of employees and employers…what about you?  Will you partner with Corporate Care today, and bring the intangible difference to your team?  Contact us at www.corporatecareok.com and let’s discuss practical ways we can partner together, helping your employees thrive not just survive.  Your People…Our Passion!  Placing corporate chaplains since 1987.

Boe Parrish, President

Kent Humphreys Today the church of Jesus Christ is facing perhaps its greatest challenge since Christ’s resurrection.  And unfortunately, the only institution that can seem slower to change than the government is the church.  On a given Sunday only 17% of the population attends church in the United States, closely following the pattern of Europe.  Yet, the Spirit of God is creative and constantly doing new things among us in Asia, the Middle East, and elsewhere.  So the question is:  “What in the world is God doing today, and what does he want us as leaders to do?”

I want to look at briefly at just one area where God is obviously at work in our day - The Workplace.

For the last twenty or thirty years we have seen God moving among his followers in the workplace, just as the church in many countries appeared to become more institutional.  While many churches invited the “lost” to come in, many also seemed to keep members “inside and busy with programs,” except for occasional activities out in the community or around the globe.  Although mission trips are more common than ever, many churchgoers continue to compartmentalize their lives into “the sacred and the secular”.  The “priesthood of the believer” is preached but not always practiced.  When Christians get really “spiritual” it’s sometimes assumed they’ll give up their regular job (and in some cases their relationships with the lost) and go on the staff of a church or para-church organization.

As marketplace organizations attract, train, and release workers back into the workplace to model Christ and live out their faith in their professions, some have found resistance from churches.  What’s missing is a sense of trust between the church and workplace organizations, that efforts to equip Christians for marketplace ministry would actually give leaders back to the church, increase giving, produce more leaders, and open the doors to those who do not know Christ.

Will God have to bring a spiritual earthquake to get our attention?

While hundreds of workplace organizations have sprung up in the U.S. alone, until recently many of those organizations didn’t dialogue with the local church.  I’m encouraged by the growing, healthy conversation that I see happening around the world between the church and workplace organizations.  These conversations among leaders are allowing them to learn from each other and listen to each other, leading both groups to lay their control issues on the altar before God.  My book (Shepherding Horses) encourages workplace leaders to build these bridges with their pastors and work together to reach their cities.  I believe that when we get leaders out of their “silos” into the areas of the marketplace, education, government, arts, media, and the church, coming together in Kingdom unity, emphasizing relationships and community, then we will see transformation in our cities.

In a recent survey in Dallas-Ft. Worth, Texas, USA it was estimated that the average church budget costs US$25,000 per conversion, while the average workplace chaplain costs just US$1,700 per conversion.  It has also been calculated that the average full-time workplace chaplain leads twenty-eight people to Christ per year, while sadly some churches do not lead one adult to Christ in a year.  One part-time workplace chaplain led 750 people to Christ over fifteen years – what an amazing impact!  Perhaps every church should consider turning a third of their staff into workplace chaplains, providing them free to the organizations in their community.

Jesus always went to the temple and we know the importance he places on the body of Christ, but we must also remember that he spent most of his time in the marketplace, with some rugged workplace leaders and hurting people.  My prayer is that leaders in the Body of Christ will come together and turn the focus of our churches outward toward the lost in our cities, and begin to reap a harvest in the greatest mission field in this century – the marketplace.

Equipping believers to share Christ in their sphere of influence at the workplace offers a great opportunity to have a daily impact on those who do not know Christ and on the community as a whole.  May we as leaders become equippers and encouragers of believers as they invade their workplaces with the Gospel of Christ.

 Our nation, our heritage, our dreams and our lives,

Have been placed at risk by deception and lies.

Congress and Senate have a passionate vision,

That includes special interest and improving positions.

Much time and effort for funds being raised,

So getting reelected is filling their days.

No vision for us or the red white and blue.

Consumes any leader, so what do we do?

We search far and wide and look for a candidate,

With national vision and passion and mandate.

A man or a woman willing to do what it takes,

To change status quo and raise high the stakes.

Every American who loves this great nation,

Must get out and vote and help change direction.

This nation so blessed doesn’t belong to the few,

It’s our great nation for me and for you!

We stand at a crossroads again in our lives,

An election of great magnitude awaiting our eyes.

The choices are different as the day and the night,

Don’t sit and complain if you’re unwilling to fight.

Go door to door and encourage the vote,

For the candidate of your choice, get out of the boat.

Make a difference today with the work of your hands,

Our future is now for the sake of our land.

Citizens of honor placing their hands to the work,

Can make all the difference in spoiling the pork.

We all have a voice if we unite arm and arm,

In reminding the boys we’re sounding the alarm.

The waste has to stop and accountability rise,

We expect our leaders to work and be wise,

With every bill that flows through their doors,

We’re going to be watching; holding their feet to the floor.

United we stand and divided we fall,

It’s time for our Congress to answer the call.

Govern for action and stop all the games,

Enact the solutions and stop laying the blame.

Your people are weary and tired of the frozen,

Get American moving or we’ll find new chosen,

Representatives who are willing and able,

To address all the issues and get votes on the table.

The hour is short and the need never greater,

We’re anxiously watching for more than debaters.

Action is needed from one and from all,

Who has the courage to stand up and stand tall?

Our nation a jewel and priceless the worth,

We tire of the interests spreading their girth.

Dividing attention and neglecting the simple,

We’re ready for action…Thus saith the people!

Boe Parrish

Edmond, OK

Forgiving others is the key to this walk,
As we travel through life, while sharing our talk,
Unforgiveness and bitterness are destroying our lives,
Has hardened our hearts and blinded our eyes.

The love was alive and so easily flowed,
Propelled us to new heights as He faithfully showed,
Secrets and treasures embedded in gold,
Through the Word that he left us, that was feeding our soul.

Reading and praying and loving the lost,
We were sharing the truth regardless of cost.
The pathway provided was filled with excitement,
As we grew in His love before the entrapment.

We were doing His will while serving others,
When an incident happened with one of the brothers.
Feelings were bruised and division occurred,
Many were hurt, but no forgiveness was heard.

Days quickly passed, and things seemed to be better,
But deep down inside our heart had turned bitter.
The love so alive that once flowed so freely,
Had vanished from within and no longer came easy.

More important than this the forgiveness we’ve learned,
Was conditional with all until our hearts they were turned.
To our brother who was wounded some time in the past,
We realized at once the damage we’d cast.

No time to waste as our heart ached to live,
Our brother we sought to heal and forgive.
No one had ever done more in the past,
To shape us and mold us as disciples so fast.

How could we possibly let this divide,
Cause so many to hurt and force them to pick sides.
But now we realize just how much it has hurt,
Our stubbornness and pride and being so curt.

The moment of truth now standing before us,
We all stood forgiving like singing a chorus.
Pride or ego or just being right,
No longer mattered, we have to unite.

Because we’re forgiven for all sins of the past,
If we do the same, our friendships will last.
Throughout all our days we will treasure the peace
We have deep within that forgiveness released.

Boe Parrish

This feeling of hope that moves me and stirs.

But the moment in life when we find that there is none,

Is like a cold winter’s day without the warmth of the sun.

Brought to me daily through a shared laugh or a smile,

As we journey through life again mile after mile.

To imagine our lives as we are trying to cope,

Ending a day thinking God there’s no hope.

Unexpected knocking that comes at the door,

No one’s expected as I travel the floor,

Fling open the door and adjusting my eyes,

Adversity delivered, and hope vaporized.

Through hurt and through sorrow, does hope often wane?

Struggling and striving we’ll work through our pain.

The challenge begins as hope disappears,

And the voices of doubt now ring in our ears.

Day after day as we move all around,

Surviving a again but not uttering a sound,

To folks walking by with smiles on their faces,

Busily headed to all of their places.

All seem so bliss as they’re walking past me,

Struggling with nothing and shouting with glee.

Alone and exhausted and stress on my face,

No friend I can turn to as I ponder my fate.

Clouds gather and darken and swirl to and fro,

As I ponder inside which direction I’ll go.

Without hope to survive or a friend by my side,

No one will notice if I exit and die.

As the decision is made in my heart,

A companion stops by and it gives me a start.

To dinner he asks and then to a movie,

Warmth came inside, and I found that it moved me.

Compassionate talk and a few minutes of time,

Is all that I needed to help clear my mind.

Some day he will know of the darkness he broke,

With his listening heart and words that he spoke.

Tomorrow will come with new strength from a friend,

As I cry out to God and I trust him again.

For one step at a time I’m changing my scope,

Thanking God up above for delivering HOPE.